FeBrUaRy 27 - 28 2006
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Monday February 27 2006

Dear Mr BiGgLeS

I got sick! I didnt even go to school and I never miss school.
And they think I might have strep throat and that can last for
weeks! How can I have a party or anything if I cant talk? This
sucks!

And what am I going to do about babysitting? I just started
babysitting Dee Dee and Terri I cant miss that! And Im having
an esbat tonight!

later

Mrs. Opland babysat for me thank Goddess. But what about
the party? And more bad news is Deno and Kayla cant come! I
dont know why Deno cant but Mindy said Kayla cant be gone or
something. I wish they could go!

I couldnt even go to my own esbat! They had it anyway which is
good. I have to go to school tomorrow cuz I got high school and
college. Really I think Im getting better I hope so!

I was going to wait to start a blog on my site but I think Ill start
one tomorrow. I cant believe I wont be doing my online diary
anymore! I do my diary on the big site but Ill do the blog on the
smaller one. But really I think it will be cool writing a blog. Then I
can write about important things like politics and sexism and
ppls rights and freedom of religion. Some ppl want to stop
Wicca and that is totally not right! But Ill really miss posting my
diary! But now that Im turning 18 I want to do something
different. Ill still write my diary of course but I might keep it
private or just show it to my best friends. But the day b4 I turn
18 is the last day Ill post it.

Ok I have to go to bed even though Im sick of being in bed! I
went to Page and Perrys today cuz I didnt want to be sick all by
myself especially with the store closed all day. Mommy didnt
work today so they could spend time together and I screwed it
up! Im really sorry. But Im glad she was there. And Uncle
Frankie was sweet he fixed me chicken soup. But Mr Biggles
wanted to eat it all! lol But Im glad I was there. I didnt want to be
sick by myself!

Tuesday February 28 2006

Dear Mr BiGgLeS

I really dont feel very good today either but I didnt want to miss
another day of school! But my throats a lot better so thats
good. I dont have much PMS but that might be part of it too I
dont know.

I didnt start doing my blog I think Ill start tomorrow.

later

Guess who called me? Oscar! He said he remembered I said
my birthday was in March but he didnt remember what day so
he called today. Isnt that kewl? I am so glad I have a cell phone
even though we arent supposed to take calls in class unless its
an emergency or something. I only met Oscar once at the
Valentines Nudist party so it is so kewl he called! He told me
about his classes cuz hes studying Botany. I almost told him
about my birthday party but I didnt. But I dont know. Really
some ppl wont be coming so why couldnt I invite somebody
else? Hes really cool and Aunt Lizzie knows him and shell be at
the party.

But then this is weird cuz I was thinking I wish I hadnt invited
Fernando and Lori! But really I dont know why. Lori wants to
bring her boyfriend but I told her I didnt think wed have room.
But really its just cuz I dont know him. But why did I invite
Fernando? I really dont know him very well even though we
have class together. Ok if it was just a regular party it would be
cool to invite him. But this is all weekend! Inviting him was
almost like asking him to spend the night! Ok I know thats silly
but still. Mindy thinks I like Fernando and I was like Mindy! Shes
the one who likes somebody cuz she really likes Jody! I hope
he can go.

later

Ok I just read what I wrote and it sounds stupid! So let me
explain. Deno really likes me and I dated him just a couple
times as friends but he wont be at the party. But Herbie my ex
boyfriend will be and I know he still likes me. But I want to date
somebody else. But sometimes I still think about Herbie. So
really Im worried that if I spend all weekend with Herbie
something will happen! So thats why I want to invite other guys.
And really Fernando is cool and I dont even know if hes going
anyway. But if he doesnt go then I should invite Oscar! Cuz that
way theyll be another guy there. Ok therell be other guys there
but thats not what I mean! lol I mean another guy who might like
me. Then maybe I can keep my hands off Herbie! LMAO j/k

I dont know what I feel my feelings r all mixed up. Sometimes I
even start thinking about Allen and that was months ago! And
last time I saw him he was hanging on Becky and kissing her
not me. Mindys family might see them sometime this summer
but I dont know. Really Id love to see Harmony again cuz he
lives close. But he might be here then anyway. And of course I
really like Mindys Aunt Yvette. And going on vacation with
Mindy was a lot of fun.

Why is everything so complicated? Sometimes I wish that u just
knew who u wanted to be with and they knew it too and that
was it. I guess it used to be that way cuz ppl would stay married
all their lives. But I dont think it really happens anymore. I
guess sometimes it does but not a lot.

But I am straight up not going to know unless I date somebody
else! But then do I want to be making out with some guy at the
party in front of Herbie? Thats not fair to him. I wish he had a
girlfriend. Hes such a great guy he really should.

I dont know. Now its like I wish we werent even having this
party! But thats stupid its just a party! I go to parties all the
time! But of course this will be different. Its for my 18th birthday
and its totally away from home and its all weekend. This is a
Hollywood party! But its just going to be Becky and my friends.

Ok Im going to stop writing this cuz this is just stupid!
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Copyright 2006 by Lorien Loveshade
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Guess who called
me?
Sometimes I wish
that u just knew
who u wanted to
be with and they
knew it too and
that was it.
I was going to wait
to start a blog on
my other site but I
think Ill start one
tomorrow.
The day b4 I
turn 18 is the
last day Ill post
my diary.
What do I do
about all these
guys? lol
I dont know
what I feel my
feelings r all
mixed up.
I got sick!
Im writing too
much about guys!
lol