Lorien Loveshade's Secret Teen Diary January 18 to 28 2002

Friday, January 18, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

Jules acted kind of weird today. I dont know what really but he was like louder than he usually is or
something. I hope hes not mad but he didnt act mad.

Kichi said we should have another slumber party. I think its a cool idea but right now I got too many
things to think about! I got a bunch of stuff to do on the yearbook and I got to get math up and theres
Jules and the coven and Help!

Saturday, January 19, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

I just got back from Aunt Evas. It was really neat and she taught me a lot for one day. Becky and I
have a great time even though Becky keeps talking about Linda all the time like shes her girlfriend!
j/k

She said that I need to decide what to do with Jules and do I really want to build a relationship based
on deceit? Of course I dont so I guess I got to tell him but Im afraid to! But she said let it happen in its
own time so I dont think Im going to tell him until after this weekend!

Nolan went to the house hes going to fix up. I dont know if hes staying there tonight cuz I dont think
things are turned on yet. I think he wants to get Denise and his family here as soon as possible cuz he
really misses them which is sweet.

I got to get ready to go to Jules. <3 I cant believe Im spending the night! Theyd never let me if they
knew hes my bf! But I got to babysit Randy I hope hes not a monster this time!

later

This was weird. First Randy wasnt a monster at all he was really sweet. He wanted to sit on my lap and
hug me and even gave me kisses. I read him a story and he was real quiet. Then he did his teeth
brushing and prayer and stuff then he wanted me to rub his back I guess his Mom Sister Vicky does
that. And he went to sleep!

So then Im the only one there and I thinking Jules is going to be here and Im spending the night! Only
I dont expect anything to happen but u cant blame me for hoping!

So Jules and Deacon Mike and Sister Vicky get home and Jules is just like he usually is when there
around he ignores me. But Im hoping when everybody goes to bed that hell come out cuz Im sleeping
on the couch in the living room it opens into a bed. And I even hinted to him about it but its like he
ignored it. So I'm thinking hes afraid of getting in trouble but its like nobodys going to think anything if
he comes out I mean he could be getting a drink of water or something. So everybody goes to bed
and Sister Vicky and Deacon Mike give me hugs and Jules sort of gives me a hug.

Ok then this is one of the parts I wonder about cuz Deacon Mike tells Jules if u need anything do it
now cuz you wont be coming out here after I go to bed. And Jules is just like whatever. So I wonder
does Deacon Mike know about me and Jules? Anyway they all go in their rooms and like thinking Jules
will never come out now cuz hes afraid of his Dad but Im still hoping.

So anyway I go to bed and then I hear something and I think maybe its Jules after all! So Im like
pretending Im asleep cuz I want to see what hell do. But its quiet for awhile so I try peeking out of one
eye but I cant see if its Jules. So I move a little so I can see and then I hear real quiet "are you asleep,
Lorien?" and its Deacon Mike. So I dont know to say if Im awake or not but I figure he knows so I open
my eyes like Im sleepy and say "Im awake, Deacon Mike." And he says "ok I just wanted to make sure
ur ok." And then he asks me how Randy was and I say fine but Sister Vicky already asked me. So
then I tell him I read to him and he brushed his teeth and prayed and I rubbed his back and he went
right to sleep. So then he says thats nice and then he asks do I want a backrub? And I say no thank u
so he says ok and gives me a pat then goes back to bed.

So I stay awake for awhile keep hoping Jules will come out but he doesnt and I fall asleep and even
wake up a couple of times but nothing happens.

Sunday, January 20, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

I went to church of course. Jules paid more attention to Roger in Sunday school than he did to me. I
guess its good cuz somebody told me if Deacon Mike and Sister Vicky knew they wouldnt let me
spend the night or come over. But I still wonder if Deacon Mike knows.

Oh guess who was in church? Mr. Zim! His brother goes there and he was visiting I guess. So I got to
meet Mrs. Zim and they have a daughter Erica I think shes 6.

I got $6 for babysitting cuz it was two hours but Deacon Mike gave me $3 more! He always gives me
extra.

Monday, January 21, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

Ok. Me and Becky talked and I decided I would ask Daddy if I can date at 14. Jules Dad is real
conservative and Jules can so why cant I plus it would mean Id only have to wait a couple months to
date officially. Plus this is a day of freedom with Martin Luther King Jr. and I have a dream I can date!
Ok Im sorry thats silly he was a great man and I shouldnt make STOOPID jokes Im sorry.

So I wait for Daddy to be in a good mood but he was and he and Nolan were joking. So then when its
just me and Nolan I ask him how old will he let his kids date. And he says hed have to talk about it with
Denise but he says probably 13 or 14. So Daddy comes out and hears it and Im thinking I blew it! But I
think I might as well go for it now so I tell Daddy I know I cant date now but Ill be 14 soon and Becky
could date at 12 and Nolan said his kids can date at 13 or 14. But then Daddy says I dont think ur
ready now and I say ok but what about when Im 14? But then he says not til ur 15. And Im like thinking
thats better he said 16 before but its still not 14. So then I say but Mommy got married when she was
16 cuz she did to her first husband and then Daddy says thats why you cant date until ur 15 we dont
want u to go through what Mommy had to. I think he means cuz she was pregnant. So I got to wait a
whole year! I cant wait that long!

Tuesday, January 22, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

I think I got a plan to date Jules! Daddy and Mommy let me go places with groups as long as theres no
boys. So I think I could say a group of girls are going to the movies and I can go with them. Then Jules
could say hes going with a group and then we could meet and be together!

Oh guess what? Mr. Zim found out I babysit and he said maybe I could babysit Erica some time. Im not
great in science but Mr. Zim said Im a very responsible student and my other teachers said so too! I
didnt know that I think thats really cool.

Wednesday, January 23, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

Im writing a cool essay in English. I dont think Ill say what it is cuz I might post it here. Me and Becky
were so bored in History today we wanted to do something crazy! But now that Im a "responsible
student" I cant do that!

I mean theres a joke in school. What's the perfect cure for insomnia? Mr. Lawrence! Im sorry thats not
nice. I usually dont talk about him cuz if u cant say something nice dont say anything at all. I wish Mrs.
Hill taught History too!

I dont know about my Jules plan. I mean I got to tell him Im wiccan and if he doesnt want to be my bf
then theres no point! I just dont know how to tell him.

later

Daddy and Nolan played poker tonight and I dont think Mommy was happy about it.

Thursday, January 24, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

I forgot tomorrows the end of the semester! I hope I got my math grades up enough cuz I got a C- and
I cant get a D grade or Im out of the coven! But really I think Im doing ok Dales a great tutor and I
think I did better this quarter than last.

I told Colleen today that I thought about having another slumber party and she like changed the
subject almost like she wasnt interested. I hope she had a good time. Of course I was in the tutor
group with Jules.

I know I should tell him about the coven but I dont think its the best time right now.

Oh ppl can start buying yearbooks next week. I hope a lot of ppl buy them cuz we worked real hard on
them. And Tiffany really wants to go to a slumber party so I think well have another one I just dont
know when. But right now Becky, Linda, Tiffany, Kichi and Rachael want to go. Rachael wasnt at the
last one but the others were. I havent asked Beth yet. I thought maybe we could ask Paula this time
we didnt last time cuz she didnt invite us to hers but she said it was cuz it was high school only and I
dont think that was her idea.

Friday, January 25, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

Mommy felt her baby kick today! I didnt get to feel it but I hope I do.

I got a letter from Laura today. She said her Daddy is doing some traveling with his work and they
might be coming out here again! I really hope so!

Oh guess what Brandy is doing? Shes going to say shes staying a friends house and really shes
going to spend the night with Les! If she gets caught shell be in MAJOR trouble. Shes always getting
in trouble.

Oh I keep forgetting to say Nolan is staying at the house hes fixing up. He really misses Denise and
his kids and wants to get them here as soon as possible. Daddy says hes a real good worker and will
make a great plumber.

Saturday, January 26, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

I didnt do much today except clean my room. Real exciting. Brandy spent the night with Les and didnt
even get caught for once! I cant believe her.

Sunday, January 27, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

I went to church with Jules today. I know everybody tells me I need to tell him Im wiccan but I havent. I
will Im just afraid to and I know I should and it gets worse if I wait but its hard to do. Plus it was a bad
time cuz yesterday was Sister Vickys birthday! I didnt know what to give her so I told her I would write
her a poem. Now I really have to finish my poem for Jules!

Monday, January 28, 2002

Dear Mr Biggles

Mrs. Hill wasnt there today and we had a substitute who treated us like little kids. I think she mostly did
kindergarten or something. I dont usually write about subs but I had her for two periods.

I almost finished my poem for Jules but I dont know if its any good. I think Ill see if Kevin will do with it
like he did with the ones I gave out for Christmas. I really should do something for Kevin hes always
doing stuff for Becky and me.

It was a full moon and we had our coven ceremony. It was great but Daddy was asking me why we
meet different days all the time. Leslie was there and she said its traditional for native Americans to
follow the cycles of the moon and cuz Daddys part Indian he thought that was ok. Thank Goddess she
was there! Oh after the ceremony we did something for Ice Falcon cuz her b-day is the beginning of
next month.