| OcToBeR 1 - 12 2001 |
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| Monday October 1 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, Well its October so its time for that question everyone in the world is asking. What will I be wearing for Halloween? Ok so no one really cares but me. Becky said why dress up we could just go as witches and be ourselves. LMAO Really thats one thing that bothers me about Halloween is that ppl promote the idea of witches being ugly with warts wearing tall black pointed hats and throwing hexes on ppl. It has nothing to do with real witchcraft or wicca which is about the earth and nature and helping ppl. Of course Becky knows that she was only kidding. Really this year I might just be me cuz I might get into a real ceremony but still I miss dressing up. They should have dress up Halloween on a different day than the real ceremony so you could do both. I know what I could do with Mr Biggles. Hes already orange which is agreat color for Halloween but I could color him black and make him a black cat! Or dress him up like a princess Im sure he'd love that! Ok this has gotten silly I'm going to now buh bye! Tuesday October 2 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, I can't believe it. Jose was almost flirting with me today! I had almost forgotten what I had heard about him liking me ok I didnt really forget but I put it out of my mind. Now I am NOT going to get all silly girlish over this I dont even know if he does like me and if he does I dont know whats going to happen and I dont really care anyway. Ok I'm lying I do care but its wierd! Jose is really funny even though hes always in trouble but its like the teachers aren't really mad at him he just pushes the limit is all. I kind of like him as a friend but Im not really interested in him that way. Oh and now guess who is hanging around me even more! Its like now I got two guys. Except I dont really have either one or hell I dont even know what I'm talking about lets just drop it ok? I got to get to sleep its like after midnight and way past my bedtime but I just cant sleep. I know I sound like a silly schoolgirl ok so maybe I am a silly schoolgirl so what go do something to urself! Ok Im just kidding. Im going to try going to sleep maybe Ill think of something boring like Social Studies. YaWn SnOoZe ZzZzZzZz Wednesday October 3 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, We didnt do much in school today just get ready for back to school night. But guess what? Mrs. Hill put together a booklet for Sept. 11 and my poem is in it! I knew this already but I wanted to surprise Becky and she might have read this before so SuRpRiSe! U can read the poem in My Poetry. I still dont think its a great poem but its in there! Were selling the books to raise money for ppl which is really cool. My Mommy and Daddy both went tonight which is cool and they were real proud of my poem in the book it was a surprise to them too! I was starting to act normal again and not like some boy crazed little school girl! And I wont say like my sister Brandy cuz shes not little! Ok so that was cruel forgive me Im a bitch! Thursday October 4 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, Ok things r more complicated. Herbie asked me to the dance! I mean its not like for three weeks so hes asking me ReAlLy early. I told him I wasnt sure if I could go to stall but really I dont know what to do! And what if Jose really does like me but now I dont know cuz he hasnt hardly talked to me. Ok this is silly girl stuff and I dont want to be a silly girl so lets change the subject! Lets talk about another silly girl Becky! I know u read these Becky but remember NOBODY from school knows about this website cept u me and Laura so I can say anything and u agreed to it anyway so dont stick ur tonge out at me! :P Becky thinks she might be bi! Im not kidding and really its ok she sed I could put it here she doesnt care what anybody thinks thats Becky! At first I thought she might mean she liked me which would be wierd but she thinks she likes someone else and that I wont tell! I dont really even know what I am but Im still a virgin so maybe I cant tell yet anyway I dont know. I think u have to experiment first and Im not ready for that yet. I havent done more than kiss a guy and a guy kind of played with my butt a little but that was thru my clothes so it doesnt count plus it was only my butt. I know Im naeve but so what! Friday October 5 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, I dont know if Im going to get ANY art for the yearbook! Everybody says like maybe and if Im not busy and well see. Maybe Ill have to do it all myself! Cept Im not an artist so that would suck. Im not going to talk about guys today so dont expect it. Oh some students r mad about Columbus Day. We dont get the day off but they say Columbus commited genocide and did germ warfare and stuff. Thats just stupid. Im not saying he was a hero but he didnt do genocide or warfare that was other ppl and if u blame him for what the others did then thats just prejudice. How can ppl who dont want prejudice be prejudiced? It doesnt make any sense. Thats the same thing as saying if some Muslims attacked a building then all Muslims r guility, or like the Japanese during the war. Its just stoopid! I wish ppl would try love instead of hate then maybe this world wouldnt be so screwed up! Saturday October 6 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, Today me and Becky and Paula had fun just mall window shopping and trying on clothes and hanging out and stuff. Becky and me want to go to the wiccan ceremony on Halloween but Paula says shes gonna help with a haunted house! I dont know that might be a lot of fun. She gets to be a sexy vampire in black. I mean how many vampires do u see in pink? Its kind of wierd Paula being in high school its like we dont see her as much as we used to. I mean its really great to get togehter but its not the same. I dont know what Im going to do cuz I could help out too. So do I trick or treat or do a haunted house or do a wiccan ceremony? I got too many choices! I really missed Laura today. I got to call her. Shes in a different time zone I cant remember if its two or three hours later there I should remember but I dont. I wish her Dad would get her a puter and let her use email. Im feeling depressed. I dont know what to do about AnYtHiNg in my life. This sucks! Sunday October 7 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, I am MAD at Becky! I wont say why I got to talk to somebody first before I post anything cuz she might read this but I am REALLY MAD! Tuesday October 9 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, Ok I can talk now about why I was so pissed. I talked to Becky about the wiccan ceremony and then I like asked her why we never did it before when her Aunt is wiccan. I mean Becky, Laura Paula and I goofed around I mean we were serious but didnt really know what were doing. Well first she admits she had been to more ceremonies than we had which I already kind of figured out. That kind of bothered me cept I thought well its her aunt so it made sense she could get in before we could. But then and this is the big thing she said they didnt have us go before cuz they didnt think Laura was ready! I was shocked and didnt know what to say. I can write this now cuz I talked to Laura about it and she was hurt but she knows. Becky wouldnt say who she said she didnt know but like some of the wiccans didnt think Laura was really serious or wasnt ready or something else STUPID! I mean it cant be an age thing Becky, Laura and I are the same age and Paula is just one grade ahead shes in ninth and were in eighth. Becky said dont tell anybody but I never promised and Im pissed so now u know. I dont think I want to go to the ceremony now and Paula wants to do the haunted house so Ill probably do that with her and Becky can go to the stupid ceremony. I guess I shouldnt be pissed at her its not her fault I just dont get it. I mean Becky knows more about Wicca than the rest of us but Laura probably knows more than me so why should she be left out? Im sorry I know its been 2 days I should be over it but its my best friend so Im not. Wednesday October 10 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, I got nothing to write cept it was a short day today I think it was some teacher thing or something. Thursday October 11 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, Ok Im a dope. A big STUPID dope! I dont mean anything to Jose he was just goofing around. I feel ReAlLy STUPID! I heard from Dwayne that Jose likes some other girl not me. I mean I didnt even tell Dwayne what I thought but thats what he told me. So Ive been worried about NOTHING! I mean I dont know why I even cared I dont really like Jose. No I mean I like him fine but not like a bf. Nuf of that. I got my new tutor today! His name is Dale. Hes kind of quieter and more serious than Anna was but I think he'll be ok. The main thing is he like really listened to me when I would talk like he was really interested. Some ppl pretend but I can tell phonies! But hes for real. The other thing is he showed us a math trick thats really cool. Hes tutoring three of us I guess cuz there was me and Samuru and Jules whos new. I guess Mr. Rodriguez thinks were the three dumb ones in class! Im sorry I shouldnt say that its not nice to Samuru and Jules! No really Dale said that he only tutors students who are smart but have problems. Maybe hes just saying that to be nice but he seemed sincere. Oh Becky and I are ok Im not mad at her but I got to talk to Aunt Eva to find out about Laura and why she wasnt invited to a wiccan ceremony. Aunt Evas not my aunt shes Beckys aunt but I call her that just like Uncle Oz isnt my real uncle. I got real ones but Ill tell u about them later. Oh Im going to see Page and Perry! There my Mom's Mom and Dad but they dont want to be called Grandma and Grandpa. There going to be coming by which is cool. There kind of like still hippies from the 60s. Ill tell u about my other grandparents later I got too many relatives to keep track of! Friday October 12 2001 Dear Mr Biggles, I really miss Ms. Adelman. I dont know if I wrote about her yet I dont think so I didnt see anything but she died when I was 10. She always had good advice and I knew her since I was like 2 or 3 I think. Im so mixed up and I dont know who to ask. I mean I get advice online and thats sweet but I knew her for years so its not the same. Ok first Im sorry to Becky. I just read my diary entries and it sounded like I said early that she wasnt my friend I didnt mean that I just meant she and Laura were really good friends but shes still my friend. Really its wierd we dont have lunch together this year but we see each other a lot more than we used to. I guess thats cuz we both miss Laura so much. And then theres this thing with Jose and Herbie except Jose wasnt anything I just got myself mixed up. I dont know what to do about Herbie and this dance. Also the dance is wierd. I thought it was just a dance but now there talking Halloween dance on the posters only somebodys upset cuz they dont believe in Halloween. Its a big controversy I guess. I dont really understand it I mean if anybody should be upset it would be real witches cuz they make us look evil at Halloween but I dont know any wiccans who are upset its some of the Christians. Oh and I know Jehovahs Witnesses dont celibrate holidays. So now the dance might be Halloween or maybe not. I guess if it is I can dress up then and not worry about Halloween which means I could go to the ceremony except I dont know whats happening with the thing about them not wanting Laura to go. Becky said her Aunt Eva will be visiting this weekend so I could talk to her except Im kind of scared to. Not really scared just worried I guess. And also Page and Perry are going to be here so I cant be in two places at once! Mr Biggles is rubbing against me I guess he knows Im upset. Also there having some parents night for students who are having lots of trouble and Im having truble in math but I dont think its bad enough for my parents to come I hope! So its like I messed up my friendships and my romance life (as if) and my school life and my religion and my family life. What can I screw up next? Oh now Brandy wants to use the computer. I know its really Bennys computer but its my room. Ok really I guess its Bennys room but Im here now. I dont even know if he'll ever move back and I really miss him. I got to write about more ppl I know Im sorry there some who are important to me and I havent even mentioned them! |
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| Copyright 2001 - 2006 by The Loveshade Family |
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| My DiArY! |
| Do I trick or treat or do a haunted house or do a wiccan ceremony? |
| Ok I can talk now about why I was so pissed. |
| I might go to a real Wiccan ceremony this year! |
| Jose was almost flirting with me today! |
| Herbie asked me to the dance! |
| How can ppl who dont want prejudice be prejudiced? |
| Ok Im a dope. A big STUPID dope! |
| I really miss Ms. Adelman. |
| Also the dance is wierd. |